Caring

Children need caring educators. Here are reasons why they might not be getting a caring teacher each year, and what you can do about it. Have another theory and solution? Email it to alexafrisbie@theeducatedparent.com to have your submission added here. It can be anonymous or with your name, based on your preference.


why


Denial. You don't want to believe a teacher would be unkind to a child.

 


Teacher mistreatment seen as a normal part of school. 

 


The mindset that parents should "always back the teacher."

 

 


Our culture values blind obedience from children, but it makes them more likely to accept mistreatment.


Parents and students fear payback from teachers if they say something about mistreatment. 

 

 


You ask your child how school was, but all you get is "fine" so you don't really know what is going on. 

 


Low pay for teachers reduces size of pool of teachers. 

 

 


Low prestige for teachers reduces size of pool of teachers. 

 

 

 


Teachers who want to overpower students rather than empower them.

 

 

 

 

 


Teachers feel the job is to scan for weaknesses - only - neglecting strengths. 

Try


It can happen so be aware of it. If you see changes in your child, consider the school environment along with other things.

 


Consider your school experiences, and what you want your child to have. 


Trust the teacher once they have earned the trust. Thank caring teachers to help children learn how teachers should treat children.  Frame your child's understanding of non-caring teachers.


Problem solve with your child, so they learn to think for themselves,  and value themselves. 


Talk about strategies for successfully standing up for yourself with someone who has power over your life. Make an invisible topic a visible one. 


Set up a "talking time" from a young age. When a child says something about things at school, be a really good listener. Say "tell me more" until you really understand. 


Support higher pay. Propose that your district accept pay steps from other districts and state transfers to have a larger pool of qualified teachers to choose from.


Ask teachers more about their jobs. Spearhead a PTO Teacher Appreciation Box or Caring Teacher Award. Try to get media coverage for your excellent educators. 

 


Trust your intuition when you interact with your child's teacher. How do you feel when you walk away? Notice any changes in your child.  Notice the faces of the children in the classroom. Listen to your teacher's view on children. Notice how the teacher talks about your child. Volunteer and observe. Notice work feedback.  Alert principal that training is needed if you are concerned.


Set expectations early with the teacher that your child learns best in a caring atmosphere where s/he develops strengths while working towards goals. If the teacher is overly negative: Give your child perspective. These items are important, but give them the bigger picture of what they offer. Set a conference, and help the teacher see how this is impacting the child and what would be more conducive to learning.